Classic Complaints

Ok. These are my all time favourite kinds of calls I get. And by favourite, I mean they annoy me, but make me laugh at the very same time.

1. The "My life is ruined because of your book" call
Elderly ladies like to call in and tell us that because we have either listed their address or postal code incorrectly, they are not getting invitations to parties in a timely manner, and are missing out on several parties. It is ruining their social lives.

My thoughts: if your friends have to get your address out of a phone book, they aren't that good of friends. Furthermore, if you have not replied to said invitations, and your friends don't follow up for an RSVP, again, they aren't that good of friends.

2. The "Your company doesn't respect veterans" call
Elderly gentlemen will call in and tell us that because we have either omitted their listing, or listed it somewhat incorrectly, we don't have respect for veterans. They went to war for our country, and we can't even give them the respect they deserve by listing them in our phone directory. And we call ourselves Canadian. Such blasphemy.

My thoughts: Yes sir. That's right. You faught in the war, so I thought it would be a neat trick to screw with you now to show you the disrespect of younger generations.

3. The "I didn't read my contract thoroughly, and now you owe me money" call
Some customers do not thoroughly read through what is written on contracts, nor do they pay attention to what they tell the sales rep to write.

Example: A manager of a hotel provided her cell phone number as the listing number on the contract; she did not provide any other number anywhere on the contract. And now the book has printed as such, and she is having a fit.

My thoughts: You're the tool who gave the wrong number. It's our duty to print the information provided. You should not be a manager if you can't even distinguish between your own cell number and the business number.

4. The "I didn't really look at my proof of the ad when I signed off on it" call
Some customers fail to thoroughly review their advertising proofs, yet sign off on them that they are ok. And then they call me in fits that the ad is wrong and they demand a refund.

Example: A restaurant owner called in and demanded to know why we changed his ad, it was not what he signed off on. In the top corner of the ad it says "Reservations Rewarded", rather than "Reservations Required". He says "What do you people think?!?!? I pat my patrons on the back when they show up on time?!?!?!?" So I investigate the situation, only to find he signed off on the proof as such. He sheepishly said "Oh, I see...."

My thoughts: To start, who is the tool in our graphics department who did that!?! Second, that is the funniest comment I have ever heard!! And of course third....did you even look at your proof before you signed it off????

There are many more, but too many to pick from. I think these will give you an idea of my day. Let's not get into the real pickle-of-a-situation calls, as you would be horrifed of the mistakes that this company makes, and the resolutions I have to make.

Well, ok. Here is a dousy. Though I can not say it's falls under favourite anymore.

One of our directories had a corrupted file~unbeknownst to our production department and the printer we use. So, there are two whole pages missing. The page prior to it was duplicated in it's place. There are three half pages ads missing now. That means big cashola is going back to the customers. Try explaining to angry construction company owners what happened and that of course we are issuing refund cheques, but we hope that they will continue to do business with us.

Oh god. I feel like I have leaked company secrets. I better shut up now before they find out and fire me!!!!